開學篇 (第一篇: 課外活動篇) Back to School, Part One, Extracurricular Activities

I can't believe the summer is almost over. It's time to think about the kids going back to school. Back-to-School means that my life will be "back to normal" and becomes more structured, dictated by my kids' after-school schedules. Now that the kids are older, they have a clear sense of what they like and what they don't like, so they choose the after-school activities that they want to participate in. My 10 year-old daughter will continue with her dance classes and Girl Scout. She had bridged over to be a Girl Scout Cadette in June. My 8 year-old son will do AYSO soccer (www.ayso.org) this fall and Little League Baseball in the spring. He will also do Cub Scouting. He will be a Bear Cub Scout this year. With both kids in Scouting, we will be selling lots of Boy Scout popcorn and Girl Scout cookies this upcoming school year.

I am making both kids do violin. I let them choose between piano or violin and they both chose violin. I think they chose violin because they perceived that playing violin is EASIER than playing piano. Neither of my kids have inherited the musical discipline (or talent) from their father, so they will never achieve the kind of success that many Asian kids have exhibited in music performance. But I want my kids to be exposed to playing music, reading music, and learning about music theory. Mostly, I want them to appreciate music and musical performance. When they go to a concert, whether pop or classic, they will realize how hard those musicians have to work to get to where they are today. Unfortunately for me, getting them to practice violin is like pulling teeth, so they'll likely end their violin career the day I don't feel like nagging them about practicing their violins.

時間也過得真快,八月中,快開學了。 開學後,我的生活也就能變得比較規律,可是會更忙碌。 我覺得除了要開車載小孩上下課之外,還要載小孩參加不同的課外活動行程。 當然還得弄便當及督導小孩的功課。 其實也沒什麼,有就學年齡小孩的父母都能瞭解我們現階段在做的事,也很清楚現階段該做些什麼事。

我十歲的女兒將要繼續她的舞蹈課程以及女童子軍(www.girlscouts.org) 的活動。 我八歲的兒子會以秋季足球(www.ayso.org)及春季少少棒(www.littleleague.org) 為主,外加男童子軍(www.scouting.org)。

為了能讓我的小孩文武雙全(可能嗎?!?!),我強迫他們一定要學一樣樂器。 他倆都選擇小提琴。 我想他們大概是認為學小提琴比學鋼琴簡單。 其實要好好學任何樂器都很難。 除了要有興趣之外,還要有恆心、毅力、及耐心。 我的小孩是比不上在美國的許多亞裔青年,各各都能夠拉或彈一手好琴。 除非我逼他們練琴,他們是不會自動自發的去練琴的。 想當年我媽也逼我練琴,逼到最後母女的感情也搞壞了,琴也越練越糟。 我覺得那時是我的心態問題,也正是青少年反抗期, 只要是我媽說的話我都會討厭。 最後我媽發現她真的是在浪費錢才在我十一年級的時候終止我的學琴生涯。 現在回想起來當然是我不對,可是我的那一段學琴經驗真的是一趟不愉快的人生旅程。 三十年後的今天,人生的輪迴,我又要來逼我的小孩學琴,感覺好像不太對。 也因為我的過去,讓我對我的小孩學琴這件事想了好久。

我的老公很會拉小提琴。 從小沒人逼他學琴。 後來是因為我公婆無法開車載他去學琴而沒能繼續學琴。 跟我差好大喔! 他的想法是要讓小孩有學琴的經驗,讓他們對音樂有基本的瞭解。 因為練過琴才能體會音樂人的才華及辛苦。 學琴的出發點有了, 下一個步驟就是要如何激發(motivate)小孩的練琴意願,少讓我用“逼”的方式強迫他們練琴。 基本上沒什麼好方法,就是我得花時間陪小孩子拉琴。 不是練琴,而是陪小孩子一起拉琴。 想當年自己練琴的辛苦,原來就是用要來培育下一代!